No, that’s just Mitchell’s hair.

This recap can also be read upside down.

Sorry this is late, these last couple of weeks got away from me a little bit but I owe it to my maternal instinct to protect Finley from any and all criticism to fully recap the episode nonetheless.

Trainer Montage

For this week’s Industry Challenge the MUAs were working on a highstreet campaign for Foot Locker. The brief for the assignment being “Young and approachable yet still aspirational” so what they wanted was very clear skin and a pop of colour (like every other industry brief they’ve ever done.) But what this really meant was that they wanted virtually undetectable eyeshadow and a little bit of not-too-statement eyeliner as a treat. Guiding them in this endeavour of makeup roulette was Foot Locker’s marketing executive Slavka Jancikova and Sherlina Nym who has worked incredibly hard to make trainers her entire personality

I can’t lie and say I wouldn’t have done the same thing with heels but sadly the footwear industry isn’t too kind to us girlies with feet so wide we could probably walk on lily pads like a jacana

I JUST WANT TO WEAR PRETTY SHOES, IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

The ones to beat in this round were the makeup counter MUAs, Conor and George, who both did really well in the skin stakes. George would’ve stomped this round if it had been a campaign for Greggs

not entirely sure a pastry famed for being flaky and falling apart is the best metaphor for skin but I get the sentiment. Sadly for George, the judges weren’t overly keen on the dots he’d mapped his model’s eyes with

I think it’s a case of not having done enough of them, they almost just look like spots rather than a liner look. On the other end of the dotted spectrum was Rossi who went with a bold white and lime green makeup look

it is WILD to me that they stepped in to make Finley tone down an inner corner highlight and they just stood by and let Rossi hang a string of Christmas lights across his model’s face. The judge’s did end up feeling like the look was more for a beauty campaign but even then, I think it looks too dated for that. This is Baby’s First Euphoria Makeup, the only thing that saves it in my eyes was that the skin was very well done.

Finley was the only one that got told to course correct, I think in part because he’d called his makeup look “robotic elvish vibes” which is basically chumming the waters of a shark infested Industry Challenge

I personally didn’t really mind the Bladerunner Legolas look that he started with, I think his model had enough of a look to pull it off

but alas, Replicant Elrond wasn’t what Foot Locker was looking for and with only 5 minutes left to go, Just-Two-Dots™ it was

I really like that they look like piercings but if anything, I think Finley should have probably concentrated more on making something of the slit in the guy’s eyebrow. However, the bigger issue for the judges was the fact the under-eye concealer was a little too thick

I did absolutely howl as Val said “it like a panda” but then realised pandas have black around their eyes so it became “like a panda in the snow”. I love a very specific and entirely incorrect visual image.

Ella and Jess were also in hot water with the judges, the latter for going too bold with her red crease

I think it’s quite cool and works as a signature punk-ish style *for Jess* but this is Foot Locker which is about as punk as a Starbucks Frappuccino. I think she was also a little thrown by the fact they wanted a pop of colour and she was given plain black shoes

but what I think the MUAs hadn’t fully bargained on is how much the makeup looks would be photographed without the sneakers in frame because I’m going to assume this shot isn’t seeing the light of day

As for Ella, she’d dithered around with what shape to go for with her statement liner and in truth while the judges hated it for being “too much” I quite like it?

again, I think her model has enough of a look to pull it off without letting it seem like too much and I’m beginning to think maybe Foot Locker chose the wrong models for this campaign…

Ending up as the judges’ favourites were Conor and Shania – the latter of which was the only person who truly got away with using an actual pop of colour with the judges loving her lime green eyeliner

it is really good and she deserved the win entirely for finding any inspiration from the ugliest pair of shoes in the room

it was a tough call for the judges though as they really, really loved Conor’s vaguely there makeup look

I mean, his model does look pretty and it’s a very cohesive look but I think it lacks any sort of edge that I would personally expect in a look for a fashion brand. Gorgeous brows, beautiful brows though.

Opposite Ends

For their Creative Brief the MUAs were tasked with creating a look that showcased a pair of opposites and because this challenge didn’t involve shoes, neither Slavka or Sherlina were trusted with judging so instead they’d brought in Mitchel, Just Mitchell and the wind swept pomeranian on his head

I have never laughed as much as I did as my mother spent the entire challenge trying to decipher his hair like a 30 minute selective attention test.

There were quite a few of the expected concepts: being both shy and outgoing

“Gender!? I Hardly Know Her!” and of course The Untreated Mental Health Disorder I Call My Inner Demon Because I’ve Watched Too Much Reality TV And The NHS Waiting Time Is 5 Years (A self portrait in acrylics and oil.) But by far my favourite looks to come out of challenges like this are the ones that the MUAs are very obviously pulling out of their asses on the spot like an improv troupe who have just had “PINEAPPLE!” yelled at them for the 5th time this month. The most egregious example of this being Conor whose theme was Sweet and Sour inspired by the relationship between he and his boyfriend

not that the relationship is turning sour, his boyfriend just likes Tangfastics while he’s more of a Starbursts kind of guy. He clearly did start panicking around the point that Mitchell crept up on him, clearly trying to decipher what the actual look was about because who knew a watermelon ombre wasn’t going to immediately read as “the pick’n’mix my boyfriend and I steal from Cineworld”? His solution to this being to draw a series of truly Not Good™ love hearts in the middle of it

The gradient from the lime green through white to pink? Phenomenal, flawless, absolutely perfect. I just feel like everything else either feels completely superfluous or not particularly well executed which to me speaks to a concept that wasn’t well thought through and was being made up on the fly like a year 8 RE presentation. But they couldn’t say that because Conor needed a moment with Mitchell

and it would’ve been a little bit awkward to have ragged on him for it and then have him ask for an inspirational hug from his idol. Never underestimate the power of the Male MUA Defying Stereotypes plot armour which they were certainly not going to be giving to Finley whose makeup I personally thought was really, really good

does the whole “makeup look representing my masculine and feminine sides” feel a little bit played out at this point in the show’s history? Sure – it’s been 6 series of very young, mostly queer artists Working Stuff Out™. It’s to be expected, like the convergent evolutionary phenomena of every film student making the same film about depression starring the same actress. God bless you Sarah, sorry for being typecast as Hollow-Eyed Girl Who’s Dead On the Inside for a whole year.

The judges didn’t really “get” Finley’s makeup because they weren’t getting enough femininity from it because the pink was too aggressive. I don’t know, that felt like such a cis response to the makeup and I think they’re lucky Finley didn’t end up writing “QUEER POWER 4EVA” across his model’s face in glitter and false lashes

That Face Off Challenge is my Roman Empire.

Jess did a better job of escaping the red chair, although in my world Finley would’ve hopped out of it too. Her makeup being inspired by the weirdly prevalent English Teacher to Influencer Pipeline which you knew was going to be a great look when she could’ve stopped halfway through and the judges would’ve still fawned over it

there’s something very Whoville about how she just absolutely obliterated her model’s facial structure with that white, which got particularly high praise from Mitchell

but her adding the colourful squiggles to represent her escape from the evil clutches of the education system (or something) really brought the piece together and added some extra whimsy to it all

and while the judges fawned over Jess’s the entire way through the process, the doors of the library were flung wide open for The Roast of George’s Inner Demon which I’m sure wont compound any issues for him in the future. I was worried for him the very second I saw his moodboard, mostly because there was an all too very real risk of the shape he was stoning in the middle of his model’s forehead going from zero to scrotum REAL QUICK

however, the judges’ issue was the fact he wasn’t concentrating enough on the makeup with his look leaning a little bit too Blue Peter “and here’s one I made earlier”

Poor George. This look was dead before he could even say “it looks like a demon when you turn it upside down!” (it didn’t, it just looked a bit like a magikarp (and it flopped like one too))

it’s one of those looks where you really do wonder what they spent their time doing. But I can at least applaud the lack of a swarovski penis on the forehead. It’s the small things in life.

In a rare occurrence for this show, only one MUA was sticking a prosthetic to their model’s face. The brave soul this week being Ella who was being very indecisive and couldn’t choose the best fursona for herself

and she had a very detailed step by step guide to keep her on track, including the all important Step 5. Zebra

I really had her pegged as more of a cat with groovy rainbow anime bangs but I’ll accept the nicheness of the forbidden lovechild of a zebra and a lion (where’s THAT Romeo and Juliet adaptation, Pixar?)

this was absolutely the best makeup in the room and I think one of the best illusion makeups we’ve ever seen on the show – the eyes were so well done

the only brief moment of concern from the judges was when she brought out the Claire’s Accessories headband and Dom went full Intervening Gay Best Friend™ trying to get you to stop soft following your ex’s socials

but come the photoshoot she’d managed to intergrate them into the look better, although I think she could’ve perhaps done with dirtying them up a little bit just so that they didn’t look so obviously made of polyester.

Ella didn’t end up getting a Ding nor a Dong, this honour instead went to Rossi for his inverted positive/negative makeup that came with a super special filter: the Snapchat Photo Negative Filter

it’s a really cool look and he got the colours spot on enough to pull off the effect. It’s also nice to see something I don’t believe we’ve seen on the show before? It feels very cut from the same cloth as Roo’s colour changing makeup last year.

Lastly we have Industry Challenge winner, Shania, whose makeup was an ode to all the extroverted introverts or introverted extroverts in the audience

my favourite part was when she started talking about the shapes being based on neural pathways which immediately impressed Mitchell beyond belief. I don’t for a second believe it was intentional but my God do I have to admire the grift – Shania is born and bred influencer material. Her PSHE teacher scoffed at her ambitions but look whose laughing now

mine all the engagement you possibly can!

An Opposites Attract Makeup Ranking
1. The Shy and Outgoing Zion Libra We’ll Work On The Portmanteau
2. Teaching Is Boring, Instagram Is Fun
3. Shania Is Still Sending Mitchell, Just Mitchell DMs
4. Finley Was Good, Actually.
=. Rossi’s Macbook Photobooth Album
6. Fruity (non-derogatory)
7. George’s Fully External Saboteur

Glitter Picker

For this episode’s Face Off Challenge, Finley and George were having to recreate what I’m sure is a Tier 7 health code violation in the form of a high impact glitter lash

I like that they stressed that the MUAs had to be careful of fallout because it’ll ruin your perfect complection and not because, you know, it’s raining glitter particles less than a centimeter away from your cornea

it’s bad enough when Dom is doing it, watching George desperately trying to spooly on glitter amidst a reality TV panic was nightmare fuel

Finley had at least taken the approach of applying the glitter to the lashes prior to applying them to his model which meant he had more glitter on them and less fallout

and by “less fallout” I do mean George had 1 speck of glitter that they needed the ol’ vignette effect to point out

overall, I think the real winners of this Face Off Challenge were the fact the models went home still identical and with both eyes in tact. But Finley did end up staying and it was goodbye to George and George’s Moustache

which is a shame because I think his VT reel makeup was my favourite of the series

I mean this entirely complimentarily, when he puts makeup on he looks like a very expensive baby.

And so, I’ll hopefully get Episode 3 out before episode 4 airs!