Drag Race Down Under, Series 1, Episode 3: Limitless Opera Necklaces

Australia’s Got Talent certainly has some alternative acts.

If this episode accomplished anything, it at least managed to rid me of the earworm that was Bing Bang Bong. Now I just spontaneously sing “Queens, Down Under!” like Jesy Nelson’s doing her Jamaican accent.

The Artist Formerly Known As…

With front runner and destined audience favourite Art Simone having fallen only in week 2 the queens are rather rattled, well everyone except Coco who is living her absolute best life

and everyone is coming to the realisation that she and Elektra are forces to be reckoned with in the lipsyncs and well, we call this foreshadowing

as for the balloon graveyard on the table, I don’t quite know why they were given the helium balloons in the first place, my best guess is a failed sponsorship with The Party People, that’s ThePartyPeople.com.au!

But Who Will Watch the Babewatchers?

For this week’s Mini Challenge the queens had to showcase their best slow-motion Baywatch Run so the call was Lifeguard Quick Drag, or if you’re Anita you show up like Miranda Hobbes on a 3 day Las Vegas bender and possessed by the ghost of Bette Davis

it’s as Anita as it could possibly come.
You would have thought that in a challenge that was essentially Be Pamela Anderson that Maxi Shield would have everyone beat seeing as she walked in with what you could conservatively describe as beachball sized tits and yet tonight she had pulled a full Michelle Visage

and was utterly and completely dwarfed by the pair of party balloons that Etcetera had shoved down her front

From whence did all these balloons come from?

Sadly the trend of Elektra having to scream her guts out didn’t continue this week, although I like to believe there’s a lot of cut footage during “Untucked” during which she screamed bloody murder into a pillow because the judging this evening is BONKERS, but I’m getting ahead of myself already. At least she was serving some Ug from Salute Your Shorts realness

meanwhile Karen looked like the unholy marriage of Vicky Pollard and Divine

and Kita Mean opted for something very similar and yet entirely different and absolutely looked like the spitting image of The Matchmaker from Mulan, but specifically after she’s had a potful of tea to the face

I also love that a lot of them were bizarrely wearing opera necklaces for this challenge just because they wanted to hide the breastplate seam at their neck, and Scarlet definitely made sure she was going to get her money’s worth out of that Godforsaken ripped prosthetic body nonsense and served up some Sad Tara Reid At the P Diddy’s Birthday Party realness

and then proceeded to frantically run with them flopping around on her chest like a pair of mackerel desperately trying to make a bid for freedom

and if there’s one thing RuPaul loves more than a fart joke, it’s tit humour which Coco was also playing up to

Hey, know your audience. Although, it’s hard to get a grasp of what RuPaul wants because her whims change like the British weather.

As is at this point contractually obligated, Elektra wins the Mini Challenge along with Scarlet Adams and her floppy tits.

Girl Groups Gone Mild

For this week’s Maxi Challenge the queens had to put on a performance of the song “Queens Down Under” as a pair of girl groups with Scarlet and Elektra being the chosen team captains as per the Mini Challenge win.

Scarlet choose Etcetera, Anita and Coco to form The Outback Fake Hoes

I feel like I’m missing a pun in their name and now I finally understand how the Americans feel while watching the Eastenders episode of Drag Race UK.

and Elektra chooses Karen, Kita and is obligated to give harbour to Maxi to for Three and a Half Men

and in a delightful change of pace, Maxi absolutely doesn’t care about the fact nobody chose her and isn’t willing to drag her team down into an unnecessary funk over the matter

Very well put.

The Outback Fake-Hoes

Despite the fact the selection process clearly made Scarlet the team leader and it being a role that she was very invested in, Etcetera was going to make herself Vice President to the Fake-Hoe Estate and frequently give input where it maybe wasn’t entirely necessary – God love her but the theatre kid energy is STRONG in this one. Although she maybe did help Scarlet scale it back for everyone in terms of the choreography but she also absolutely just let Coco go ahead with trying to actually sing her lyrics as opposed to the usual fake rap, talk singing we’re used to by this point. Coco struggled a lot during the recording session in which she gave us some classic Gia Gunn nasal mosquito vocalisation but when it came to the actual performance it was cute in a mediocre filler song in Hairspray kind of way, and she looked adorable

that 30s, fluffy bob looks really good on her and I love the outfit – it’s very playful and gave her a lot to work with, I personally found her the most eye-catching of the entire group, aside of Anita who was dressed as the SNL Chicken Lady

and then in a superb bit of branding re-mentions her Dry Ass Pussy while doing the queen’s wave

I for one am glad if she manages to rake in the cash by being a crass Queen Elizabeth. As for the rest of her segment, it’s as bizarre as you could imagine and yet worked on every possible level. I’m convinced she’s simultaneously existing on several different celestial plains, our mere mortal realm is no cage for Anita Wigl’it.

I do think Scarlet could have afforded to maybe make a bit more of a statement with her dancing, she toned it down a little too much – there was a lot of just walking and pointing, but she looked the part in her sort of faded denim get up

certainly the most “girl group” of the punch, although it’s not hard when Coco is doing a vintage boudoir shoot, Anita is the aforementioned Chicken Lady and Etcetera looks like a sitcom mother in a dream sequence

it’s all in the feathered wig and slightly manic smile that never once faltered.
I really liked Etcetera’s verse, especially the use of Federa as a rhyme for Etcetera, which of course gets treated to the very tired trope of “you’re queer and referencing sports? HOW WEIRD?” which we can very much retire anytime soon, thanks.

On the whole, the group smashed it, there were a few lipsync issues here and there for Coco and Anita but I thought they still managed to sell the performance

Three and a Half Men

While a coup simmered in Team Scarlet, Team Elektra was very much just sunshine, rainbows and the three hundred trombone slides the sound mixers played during Maxi’s recording sessions in which she gave up on the very concept of time and music. What really helped the group get along was the fact Karen, Kita and Maxi are very much Not Dancers while Elektra is a dance instructor, so she was in her element and I think this is the first time in Drag Race herstory that a group of mostly non-dancers actually got along and didn’t have a mid choreo session cry, which speaks largely to Elektra’s teaching abilities. Although there wasn’t anything particularly challenging in the performance – it, like the other team’s, was mostly just walking, pointing and occasionally hitting a pose while giving some comedic asides to Maxi whose breast plate was back in action

No, I cannot explain the outfit, but that’s kind of the joy of these girl group challenges because you don’t know what song you’re going to do or what the other queens are going to wear and so we ended up with this hodge-podge that it somehow less cohesive than the first group’s

I really like Elektra’s leotard with the motorcycle jacket – it has a lot of attitude and fun to it, as for Kita and Karen, there’s something just a little bit dated about their looks – Kita looking like she does horse dancing at a circus in the 50s and with Karen I think it’s mostly the very Texan housewife hair because I do like the tasselled jumpsuit, that I think she could have a lot more fun with and yet was relegated to a mere twiddle of nips from Elektra during their bit in the middle where they stopped to try and be sexy for a bit.
I personally think Karen had the weakest verse across the board, it had a lot of dead space in it and just didn’t flow very well while Kita had given herself quite a complex verse and yet still managed to get her mouth around the whole thing, which surprised me to be honest. I do kind of wish they had left her on-the-fly French verse in though. And then we have Elektra who did The Absolute Most and essentially put on her own one woman show while the others moved behind her like a sentient backdrop, which I’m all right with – it’s a competition, make yourself shine but clearly the judges felt differently and didn’t care for the Beyonce of it all. But you know if she had brought herself down to the level of Maxi, Karen and Kita you know she would have been told off for not selling herself enough.

Prom Night 2: Bogan Boogaloo

We’re once again dipping into the prom theme for this week’s runway, except this time it’s specifically themed as Bogan Prom Realness. I was unfamiliar with the term “bogan” but it’s essentially tacky, tasteless and uncouth and comes with some uncomfortable classist baggage but nonetheless, onto the Bogan Ball we go!

First up was Etcetera Etcetera in her pink velour tracksuit and Ugg boots on the runway

it’s a cute look but there’s nothing even remotely “prom” about it and I think the fact everyone else went so on theme with it, hers just kind of fell that little bit short.

Coco on the other hand NAILED IT, completely and utterly with her look

the twigs in her hair, her hitched skirt and the dirtied knees – it’s a really fun character and I thoroughly enjoyed it because after every prom, formal – whatever you want to call it, there is inevitably an “X had sex in the bushes” rumour – it’s the first rule of Prom Club.

I was a little confused by Anita’s offering, and I think it’s mostly due to the very formal gown which, to me, as something of the Celine Dions about it

It might also be because she went through that phase of having novelty handbags wherever she went. As for the makeup, I think it might have pushed too far into the caricature, which would have been fine if she went there with the outfit but there was just a bit of a mismatch for me, whereas with Scarlet she perfectly managed the balance

I don’t know if the dress needed the nozzle but I don’t really care because I was sold the moment she poured the wine out of her handbag.

Elektra also came in with metallics and Michelle called this basic but I… really, really like it

it’s no more basic than anyone else’s and the category, for all its faults, kind of called for that? You can’t call it a realness runway and then be mad when someone tries that. I will say, the boots are all wrong, but it’s nice to see the patent black, drag boot getting its recurring slot again.

Kita’s look confused me the most I think, which is saying something after I likened Anita’s attempt at Bogan to Celine Dion, but this neon, rock and roll Beano character was very odd

and, I assume, very much the result of a queen raiding her pre-Drag Race closet hoping to make something they already own fit the category because I noticed they took a lot of care to not show whatever was emblazoned on the back of it.

Maxi took it in a very different direction and dressed as the chaperone, complete with overtly large fanny pack, three of the worst fabrics you could possibly imagine and another of her limitless opera necklaces

Maxi always delivers in terms of characterisation, she just has that real spark to her delivery and it really helps sell her outfit.

Then Karen came in doing a very similar thing, but was kind of Maxi Shield’s character’s high school glory days where she was the uncoolest kid in all of Australia

it’s a fun look but beyond the teeny tiny tiara in the hair, nothing about it seems particularly “prom” to me and clearly I’m suddenly a stickler for the rules but if you say “realness” in the title, I kind of want accuracy.

An Unofficial Bogan Prom Ranking

  1. Scarlet The Wine Bag
  2. Elektra’s Basic Prom Queen
  3. Coco Jumbo in the Bushes
  4. Maxi Shield The Den Mother
  5. Etcetera Velour
  6. Anita’s Bog-Dion Prom
  7. Kita Mean’s Neon Whatsit?
  8. Karen as 80s Rosé


As for the winner of the episode, Scarlet is given the win for essentially dimming her own flame while the judges decide that Elektra, a drag queen, should not have made herself the centre of attention and is thus deserving of being in the bottom 2, along with Coco Jumbo. Personally, I think Maxi and Karen should have been in the bottom. I just really don’t see what was so majorly wrong about what Coco and Elektra did, but onwards we shall go.

Shake and Groove

With it being an Elektra vs Coco lipsync, we knew it was going to be one hell of a time and I think Shake Your Groove Thing by Peaches and Herb was a really good choice for the two of them. Coco didn’t do a great deal but she really just exudes an effervescence when she performs and it suited the song in all its disco glory

Elektra on the other hand was going absolute HAM on the stunts pulling out many a flying splits and shablams

as well as a lot of boot slapping, like a lot of boot slapping, which was a little bit funny with her incredibly long legs – like a cricket trying to scratch its own ankles.
I think it bordered on being a little manic but she managed to pull it back every now and again for a bit of interaction between herself and Coco

I really enjoyed the whole thing and I think it’s a real shame that one of them had to leave with the unfortunate queen being Coco Jumbo

I think she was thoroughly shafted by some majorly wonky judging which is kind of par for the course on Drag Race but something about this episode made it VERY obvious.

And so only 7 queens remain…

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