It’s here. It’s queer. And its lighting is homophobic.
The Entrance Looks
The entrance looks are literally seen for about 5 minutes, there’s a risk they are going to be covered with paint or dunked in the water so obviously nobody is going to go all out for it and we hardly expect the height of fashion, but for the most part all the queens really brought it.
12. Juice Boxx’
I LOVED her faux freckles but this outfit is just ever so slightly off in every regard – the colours, the lengths, the sizes. It wasn’t quite the full Victoria’s Secret fantasy.
11. Scarlett BoBo
She looked like the aunt you don’t invite to family events anymore.
10. Priyanka
I adore her, she seems like a great time and at least you can’t forget her name.
9. Kyne
Maybe it’s because we’re fresh off the Aiden Zhane boat, because this was good but it also felt a little tired. But we do love a hat.
8. Tynomi Banks
It was certainly the best of the glittery body suits. I can’t wait to get to her proper runway looks because she seems like she’ll pretty bloody brilliant.
7. Kiara
Anything that even tangentially reminds me of Jem and The Holograms is a yes from me.
6. Rita Baga
One part 80s sci-fi b-film 1 part Paperchase journal. We didn’t get very good angles of it but its shapes did look interesting.
5. BOA
This bovine space invasion nonsense <3
4. Anastarzia Anaquway
I mean, she’s just drag excellence – the way she carries herself, her mannerisms, her looks. Ugh, LOVE.
3. Ilona
Do I wish there was slightly more variation between the colour of her wig and feathers? Yes. Am I mad that she looks like the Yeti from the criminally underrated film Abominable? Absolutely not.
2. Lemon
Well, we’ve been waiting for someone to recreate the Rhianna Met Gala Omelette look for AGES so thank God this finally happened. The dress underneath was a little bit Alexis Michelle on the fur runway but who cares when you have a 5 metre long train?
1. Jimbo
God bless this creepy pasta Mickey Mouse.
MAIN STAGE: Oh Canada Couture
So they queens were given various boxes of Canadian related gubbins which they had to use to make their first outfit and for the most part everyone was quite creative or at least utilised their materials in interesting ways, others – not so much.
12. Juice Boxx
Bless her cotton socks, this 80s porn Wilma Flinstone was really the only bootable option.
11. Scarlett BoBo
Maybe I’m just bored of cowgirl looks?
10. BOA
I appreciate the Divine-ness of it all, but that’s also the reason I cannot stand to look at it much longer.
9. Ilona
I understand absolutely nothing of anything that is happening here, but her makeup is so interesting.
8. Priyanka
Her presentation on the runway was the best by a country mile and I do genuinely like the outfit, it’s just a little safe compared to the rest going onward.
7. Lemon
This Sailor Moon sportsball player? Yes. I just wanna talk about the junk corset and drawstring curtain she hung around her waist – WHY? The rest is so good! It also must be pointed that just about none of it is actually sewn either…
6. Rita Baga
I honestly wish she hadn’t bothered with the reveal – I thought it was so much more fashionable before it.
5. Anastarzia Anaquaway
Why is everyone sleeping on this look? It’s so fun! Even the show swept past it with by far the shortest, worst filmed runway segment!
4. Tynomi Banks
I’m not entirely sure how much sewing went into this but I’m a sucker for layering.
3. Kiara
I’m a child of the creepy pasta generation – of course I’m going to love the haunted Doctor Who scarecrow.
2. Jimbo
As far as construction goes – this was the most elaborate and ambitious – I can’t imagine sewing all those zips together. And I’ve known Jimbo for 1 episode and this already feels like her distilled into a zingle garment.
1. Kyne
Sue me. This was BY FAR the best outfit, who cares that i shed balls as she walked – it was divine. The jingling, Priscilla-esque bell bottoms, the gold glow to her makeup. A travesty that they even put her remotely near the bottom to be honest.
See you next and as ever
stan Jimbo.