MasterChef 2023, Episode 11: Calumpling-Dumpzone Scream into the void and the void screams back. *waves cheerfully* Read More
Glow Up, Series 5, Episode 1: Earthworm Circus The number you have dialed is unavailable. This recap will change colour when wet. Read More
MasterChef 2023, Episode 10: Debranded Chocolate Wheat Shapes Aren’t I always? Not all heroes wear capes. some breathe fire instead. Read More
MasterChef 2023, Episode 9: One Thing and a Flatbread Cher’s original draft wasn’t quite as catchy. Hi, it’s me. I’m the problem, it’s me. Read More
MasterChef 2023, Episode 8: Irish Fajita it is an 8pm slot, after all. I will accept chocolate-based bribery. Read More
MasterChef 2023, Episode 7: Loin of Circus Pony I mean what is this? A cooking competition? I think it looks quite contemporary. Read More
Interior Design Masters 2023, The Final: Authenticating Diplodocus This is my favourite rock band. At least Tom was still technically in the final? Read More
Drag Race: All Stars 8, Meet The Queens: Gift Bagged Elephant Their hair is big and full of secrets. Content warning: Kandy’s Alien Runway. Read More
MasterChef 2023, Episode 6: The Full Misery I was rooting for you! We were all rooting for you! This recap is shop bought. Read More