Your Premium Reality TV Recapping Nightmare
Powerful shoulder pads lead to a powerful shrug.
Free of the weeds of Movie Week we run full tilt into Accidental School Disco Week so grab your supermarket own brand squash and ration your Pringles accordingly, we’ve got an Argentine Tango, A Sambarena and a plethora of insane trousers.
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Perhaps this was Cruella’s Villain Origin Story all along?
And so Movie Week must come to a close and it feels only right that on this evening we acknowledge a series of Box Office Disasters…
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Well, it’s one way to describe Movie Week.
It is of course the scariest time of year: Halloween Movie Week! And we’ve got body horror, glittery injury detail, CATS (2019) talk, waking nightmares and cursed kingdoms!
And every Sunday evening the Teletubbies make a blood sacrifices to their Sun Goddess to sate her unquenchable thirst.
After a chaotic, scattershot conclusion to the leader board, the First Boot of the series was always going to be a heart-breaking affair.
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She came. She danced. She redefined art.
Judging by how this episode progressed, I can only imagine we have angered some sort of ancient Eldritch being. By which I do mean that Giovanna Fletcher IS NOT PLEASED.
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BIG MOOD.
If this first week is anything to go by we’re in for one hell of a series – I just hope Vicky Gill manages to find a better ostrich feather and sequin supplier this week.
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TessBot, available for all your babysitting needs!
Get your sparkliest frocks or your glitziest shirts because it’s back and it’s as slightly bloated as ever! It’s a beautiful thing, truly.
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I took a bit of a break during the festive season but I can’t entirely ignore this countdown can I? And what better way to get to talk about the dances I never got to cover!
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It’s been a rough year but Strictly still managed to find a way to shine and provide us with a glinting sequin of joy in a year that lost its sparkle within a matter of months. And what better way to honour the success they managed to make of it than a little retrospective, by which I mean a series of lists including Best Dances, Favourite Contestants and of course Best and Worst Outfits.
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In many ways I prefer Napkin-Phantom to Facepaint-Phantom.
As the curtains fall on our Musicals Week Quarterfinal a new Bottom Two Destroyer emerges like a particularly chaotic phoenix out of the ashes of a broken Strictly dream.
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