Sewing Bee, Series 11, Episode 1: The Miss Carrot Fudge Pageant

Live footage of Orla being struck by the idea of Chained Jeans, “Ch-eans”.

This recap is made out of vintage bridal quality raw ivory silk. Pleats optional.

To be fair to Jade, it’s a pretty good topographical map of the Wakefield area.

I marked myself as “Safe from the events of the Glow Up finale” on Facebook.

It’s been a long week.

It’s Amber Davies’s Eyebrows vs The World.

These callipers are my new mortal enemy.

I too aspire to be the personification of Merriam-Webster.com

Alarmingly convincing Val Garland cosplay.

Welcome to a Legally Distinct Recap.

Close enough, welcome back Princess Diana.

Sorry this is late, I was busy filling out application forms with the lyrics to The Cheeky Song.

Me getting ready to try get a second free sample.

We’re holding space for the Drophead.

Sitting alone in the VIP.

I’m so into meditation right now.

Wanted: Courage.

You better not be dressed like a sexy inner tube when I get home.

there has never been a more stressful moment of television than watching Steve’s amphora spin around at 100mph.

Thou shalt not post.

Ariadne Reviews