If you stare for too long into the abyss, the abyss quacks back.
It’s the finale! And once again we’re doing Garden Week, this time with 100% less gnomes, it was the only way to get Cellan to come back to Gladstone.
The first rule of Urinal Club is that we don’t talk about Urinal Club.
It’s the semi-final which of course means it’s Bathroom Week and as we work our way through every bathroom fixture you can imagine, they draw ever closer to sending someone insane by making them make a clawfoot tub in only 7 hours.
Find someone that looks at you the way Keith Brymer Jones looks at a 10 second candlestick.
Welcome to The Great Pottery Throwdown’s Emotional Destruction Week, where not only Keith does the crying for once.
You will be hearing from the Springwatch lawyers.
No labradors were harmed in the writing of this recap.
For one brief moment, I did think they were going to whip off that hessian cloth and reveal Siobhan McSweeney.
It’s 60s week, so think The Beatles, Thunderbirds and Disturbing Jelly Salads.
Love Productions, you can have Britain’s Next Top Mud Wrestler for free.
If you thought Garden Week was going to be a fun and sedate time, YOU THOUGHT WRONG! Strap in, there’s Gnomish Discourse to be had.
Three weeks of the show being branded the most wholesome show on television and then BAM! Filth.
Raku Week returns with everyone’s favourite elements: Fire! Combustion! And lots of questionable hand movements.
For a show so wholesome, it does occasionally lean into SEVERELY threatening territory.
In this week’s episode we ponder “When is a Bottle Kiln a vase?” and “When is a cat inanimate?”.
Now it’s a party.
In this week’s episode Pet Wars heats up and we ponder “What came first: the ceramic chicken or the ceramic egg?”
I for one salute our new pottery overlords.
It’s back, so pour yourself a nice ceramic bottle of milk, sit back and let’s pretend like I know what I’m talking about!