It’s an acting challenge week so strap in for a rough ride.
The queens mourn the loss of Soju for all of 10 seconds, although talk of The Cyst lingers for longer in an attempt to make it the “Vaaaanjie” of the season, it is not. We then have a friendly game of Fuck, Marry, Kill in which everyone unsurprisingly wants to kill Silky, although Kahanna very much wants to fuck her beforehand.
It’s the return of the photobombing mini challenge, I swear to God if this one returns and the puppets don’t come back I will be mad about it. The best part of the challenge, as usual, is the 15 minute quick drag looks that the queens have to come up with and there are some corkers, Plastique’s 15 minute mug looks like a Serena Cha Cha mainstage look:
Vanjie looks oddly like Cara Delevigne’s evil twin that they keep in the attic and feed on nothing but fish heads:
Then because VH1 made the decision not to caption anyone’s names during the challenge I had to spend 6 minutes trying to work out who this was:
IT IS EPISODE 2 I KNOW NOBODY. Spoiler alert, it’s Shuga. She did luckily spend the rest of the episode with a cap that said “SHUGA” on it in massive plastic letters, so at least she’s self-aware.
The winners of the challenge are Brooke Lynn for doing an impressive splits in front of “The Macrons and Some Other People” and Silky for just getting buck naked, and a little bit because we need to piss Ariel off even more. They of course win the privilege (What privilege!) of choosing their teams. Scarlet is left to last and makes some terrible Pretty Woman reference in which she calls Julia Roberts “Julie”. She also has a long monologue in which she uses the words “oats” far too many times and you can see her slowly losing her train of thought as she’s saying it.
Stirring the Pot
The teams are in the middle of deciding who gets to read which piece of terribly unfunny dialogue in this week’s acting challenge when Ru comes over and revels in his ability to create drama by asking Brooke’s team what they think of the other team. Long story short, Ariel says Silky wont let anyone else have a moment to shine and Ru just keeps asking questions and Ariel just keeps going, and everyone is agreeing. You can also pinpoint the moment where Ariel realises this will come to bite her in the ass:
And Ru is just having THE BEST TIME and basically calls everyone out for not trying to match Silky’s energy
I really wish they would go back to having celebrity guests come in and direct, it’s always a lot better (Aubrey O’day and The Will and Grace Ass aside) than Ross and Michelle who honestly give terrible advice, and the actual script is bad enough already that adding their direction to the mix is, well we end up with the Mercedes situation in which Michelle gets increasingly frustrated with Mercedes’ very thick accent and it got very uncomfortable because you can tell it is freaking Mercedes out. The Get Out parody, which was arguably the best written acting challenge in the last 4 seasons, eventually just dissolves into forgotten lines and Michelle screaming “I DON’T WANT TO DO THIS ANYMORE.” – which you would think would mean they would rethink acting challenges at least a little bit.
I’m also positive that you can actually hear Michelle and Ross cackling throughout Vanessa’s Cookie Monster Cool Dad voice in the final cut.
I would Really Ra’jah You Wouldn’t
Ariel’s comments about Silky come to a head during the preparation for the main stage looks (see the recap here) although Ariel owns up pretty quickly and the actual drama isn’t between them because Yvie takes issue with the rest of the team’s silence which sparks a confrontation between her and Ra’jah after Yvie makes a dig at Ra’jah’s makeup, which I think as Ra’jah did have one of the best looks you can see why she was maybe a little pressed about it. The main issue though is Ra’jah confessional clapbacks are terrible and rambling, something about swamp monsters and Yvie smelling bad? I dread her making it to the reading challenge. Eliminating her before then would be a mercy killing more than anything else.
It of course runs over in to Untucked where Yvie apologises and Ra’jah storms off and has a cigarette with Plastique whose face is very: “I wish to be excluded from this narrative”:
Plastique is growing on me, I just wish her fans weren’t Valentina levels of insane.
Flips, Kicks and Near Death Experiences:
Mercedes and Kahanna find themselves in the bottom 2 and it is no coincidence that they basically had the same role which included voguing into a scene and delivering a single line of dialogue. They were doomed from the start – they didn’t even have enough time on screen to add any characterisation beyond wildly flailing their arms around, which brings us nicely to the lipsync.
It was… wild. I hovered between a double elimination, a double save and just Kahanna not actually surviving her stunts because in the pantheon of Awkward Cartwheels, she certainly made a grab for Monique Heart’s crown. She does at least execute a pretty phenomenal back spring, so she at least had that, but Mercedes was just beat for beat perfection and after her emotional critique it was great to see her have this moment.